The CDP In Review: Best Essays (2011)

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Here now, 11 of the Best CDP Essays from 2011, listed in ascending order of greatness. None of these essays are available in book form or anywhere else; enjoy.

#11. ‘Tat’s All Folks.‘ – 1/11/11
My first tattoo doesn’t turn into a humiliating failure. Yet.

#10. ‘Canceling The Simpsons? Best Idea Ever.‘ – 10/10/11
Why the greatest television show of all-time needs to leave to remain relevant.

#9. ‘The Most Realistic Video Game Ever Made.‘ – 7/18/11
How UFC Undisputed blew my mind right out the back of my skull.

#8. ‘The La Crosse Incident.‘ – 8/8/11
Possibly the most paranormal experience I’ve ever had.

#7. ‘Happy 7th Anniversary; Sorry I Ruined Your Life.‘ – 7/11/11
The anniversary we spent in the cabin of a tow truck.

#6. ‘The Cutest Loser.‘ – 10/17/11
The Missus accomplishes something nearly miraculous.

#5. ‘Somebody Must Have Stepped On A Butterfly.‘ – 7/27/11
Time Travel exists, and I have proof in the form of a children’s book.

#4. ‘Identity Theft Is Unfortunate.‘ – 4/18/11
Waking up to no money in your bank account is a humbling, terrifying, infuriating experience.

#3. ‘The Golden Briefcase.‘ – 6/20/11
The Summer I spent peddling pornography and mowing lawns.

#2. ‘2011 State Of The CDP Speech.‘ – 12/26/11
I’m nearly 30; it’s time to do something else for awhile.

#1. ‘So Long, And Thanks For Laughing At My Poop Stories.‘ – 2/18/11
Thanks, indeed. How a day at a High School changed my perceptions of nearly everything.

Sound off in the comments section and enjoy your day.

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