Another Lost Friday is upon us. We have nothing to discuss.
Seriously, this post has almost nothing to do with Lost; I’m just cashing in on the brand, so to speak. Feel free to hang around, though. I did, however, find out that the name of the season two finale will be called, ‘Live Together, Die Alone,’ so don’t say that I didn’t give you any news today. Next week’s Lost Friday will get you all set with everything you need to know about the remaining episodes of the season.
For those of you who show up solely for Lost Friday, you should know that six days out of the week, I’m talking about other stuff on here. Usually better stuff. Who knows? You might just find another reason to come here besides hunting for shirtless photos of Jin and Sawyer. The things that people search for never cease to amaze me. If you want to catch up on the CDP, click on the ‘First Time Here?’ link at the top of the sidebar. You’ll thank me later.
So, what did everyone do with their Lost-free Wednesday this week? Me? Well, I got a lot done. There was a new Mythbusters on, along with the American Idol results show. I wanted to use yesterday to catch up on a slew of TiVo’ed Supernatural episodes I’ve been meaning to watch, but to no avail. Then I watched the Brewers game and fell asleep on the floor. It was really something special; I can cross a lot of things out of my day planner.
In car accident news, the Missus is able to rent a car on the dime of the dude that hit her, so she’s currently speeding around the city in a new Chevy Cobalt. As you would naturally assume, she hates the damn thing with a passion. The early projection is that her ’99 Taurus is totaled, so I guess we’re going to have to start looking for a new car. As I’ve said before, if we could afford a new car, we would have bought one by now, so if anyone wants to go ahead and purchase a new car for the Missus, shoot me an e-mail and we’ll talk. Her neck is feeling a little better.
Let’s talk about beer for a second. In the beautiful city of New Glarus, the New Glarus Brewery manufactures my absolute favorite beer in the history of mankind, the Tail Wagger Barley Wine. For those out of the loop, Barley Wines are viciously strong beers, about 12% in some cases (read the article in the link). If you prefer wine over beer, a good Barley Wine is a gateway to enjoying brews just as much. Also, it will floor you after one bottle.
Anyways, the folks at the brewery apparently had a problem with the bottling of their last batch of Barley Wines. From what I can gather, the distributor sold a 6-pack for the cost of a 4-pack, and when the stampede was over, the New Glarus folks barely broke even on the sales (Barley Wines are a bit pricey). This caused a shutdown of the manufacturing of the Tail Wagger, and the rumor is that it might never be made again. This hurt me deeply.
Quickly, I got in touch with a beer expert I know who has connections. The plan was to buy out every remaining bottle of Barley Wine in the state. With New Glarus being a local brewery, Wisconsin is the only place where this brew exists, and we were running out of time. After weeks of phone calls and writing checks, we each got hooked up with a case of what could be the last bottles of Tail Wagger ever made.
My goal is to ration out these bottles over the course of a lifetime. Only certain special events and circumstances will be ‘Barley-worthy,’ and I’m not sharing with anyone, ever. My plan is to drink 14 bottles tonight, and when I wake up from the coma it will be 20 years in the future, when they will have found a way to clone the precious Tail Wagger for worldwide consumption. I’ve got it all figured out, and nobody’s stopping me.
This weekend; not entirely sure what’s going on. Post a comment or send an e-mail, and if I’m not busy I’ll show up at your party. My rates are reasonable and I’m always open to new things.
I feel like I’m forgetting to say something. Oh yes, Evangeline Lilly was in a sex line commercial from years ago that still airs on late night TV. This is incredibly funny to me; I actually saw it for myself a few weeks ago. I can hear the phone calls now, “I want to talk to Kate! I want carte blanche!”
It goes without saying (and I don’t want to ruin your fantasy), but if you expect to talk to anyone even vaguely resembling Kate (who’s no prize pig, to be quite honest), you will be sorely mistaken. I do bet that the company gets a lot of calls from guys who want the ladies to act out Lost fantasies with them, and that helps me sleep a little better at night.
Maybe we’ll find out on Lost that the phone sex lady Locke was talking to in season one was Evangeline Lilly, pretending to be Kate, whom Locke wanted to be addressed as Helen, the woman he lost at the hands of a con with his father. Man, this show has so many twists and turns! I’m going to pitch that to the writers; maybe they’ll buy my wife a new car.
Not only is next week the last week of April, but it’s another ‘5 posts in 5 days’ stretch here at the CDP. I’ll be kicking next week off with an essay that rocks so hard I had to roundhouse kick it into quarters. It is an all-true quadrilogy that I’d turn into a movie if I had the good sense to make some serious cash. Come on back; you don’t want to miss ‘oot:
Monday – Love Tha’ Player, Hate Tha’ Game (Part 1).
Tuesday – J. Crew & The Mystery Girl (Part 2).
Wednesday – Brace For Impact (Part 3).
Thursday – Three Strikes, You’re In (Part 4).
Friday – Lost Friday – Clip Show Edition.